回家了,还是那么热,让人身不由己的会浮躁,本来早该解决的事情却拖到现在,时间就这样匆匆过去,晚一天就会少很多机会,也罢,就让它溜走吧,独自在北京生活已经一年了,也就是说住校已经七年了,突然发现原来自己还没有独立,因为当问题来临时我想到的仍不是自己,而是也许谁能帮我解决或者是退却,逃避.不甘平凡就得为此付出代价.今天是我收到广院通知书的日子,现在已经整整一年了,这一年过得是这样的快,而我所学的却远低于我所期望的.我得开始为将来的路打算了,下个学期,我知道又会有很多诱惑和矛盾等着我,如何面对?不论如何,我的心不免要饱受折磨,也许这才是我来广院的第一年得到的最多的东西.我犯过错,从一开始起,直到我离开的前一天,有些是不可原谅的,但是已经成了历史,没有补救的办法,只希望记忆能冲刷一切,人生是一场一条命的游戏,我多想能读取去年此时的存档,把这一年再过一次,然而没人能满足我的愿望.人永远是自己人生的开拓者,当然,也会是终结者.昨天看了Britney Spears live from Las Vegas除了震撼外还有许多感触:她曾经对理想的渴望与追求,和理想实现时的快乐经历或许比她的舞姿更吸引我,特别是当她说I feel so wonderful because I'm doing exactly what I want to do时的骄傲和自信,我在想是否真的该向她一样never ever lose my passion to dream.

终于考试了,世界杯也要决赛了,突然回到久违的空间,发现这里原来是如此的out of touch, 看来我早已被overide concern了, 甚至连have a say的权利都没有,这个学期一直在following sb's lead好好学习,期末复习才发现做了一个学期的电子版笔记would not be helpful in creating the necessary revision confidence.学校内外的打印室充斥着各种版本的复习题,考完马哲大家才发现它们spectacularly missing the point,并且应该be not entitled to participate in such debates.不过这次马哲的题目的确很难,或者说是变态也无过,出卷老师完全dismiss the students as stupid or illogical smacks of arrogance and naivety . 仔细想象这大1一年所学,原来曾经不以为然的返读竟然成了我学到东西最多的一门课,这里用的每局英语几乎都是泛读里的,actually,in essence,庄老师才是a woman of laughter and grace,她wrote as easily as she breathed,而且她was a egalitarian in the truest sense,她respect privacy并且never picked favorits也never hogged credit of handed off blame,她总是comfortable hanging around with我们并且会laughing uproariously,即使生气了她也只是说I'm serious啊!她很幽默但never as a pose,或者说她很搞笑但in no way priggish.曾经我们觉得她有点behind the tmes,但后来才发现原来我们都clueless about她,事实上,她才是那个ahead of the curve的人,她才是国传时尚界Number 1.一直以来classroom are hotbeds of neurosis and jealousy,但在她的课上我们却是editor ar large,她教会我们如何wrote a vigorous defense,也让我们明白如何在课上尽情地savoring life.其实我们05英播是一帮mischievous的学生,我们从进校的那天起就已经gotten off on the wrong foot,我们曾had trouble with one of my neighbors甚至escalated into larger , more complicated disagreements ,不过幸好我们学习了泛读,知道如何forged some kind of peaceful relationship with others.其实最好的办法不是override their concerns更不是trying to provoke antagonism而是要shared our feelings,因为talking things out was the only true path to conflict resolution,而且我们不必be ashamed of our feelings.我们很多人都曾觉得被taken in到这个专业,骨子里focused on CBA as our likely long-term security headache,认为it is them that presents the abiding challenge to our might.其实that perspective was wrongheadid since it's ingrained in human nature to fight and argue. 不可否认他们在学校里have the greatest bearing, 但毕竟it's chilly to remain at this high altitude, 他们必须preoccupy it.而我们偶尔也有人会striking absurd poses,或者是give a pose for the cameras,这都是一种不smart的做法,而且这种不 low-key的做法只会planted themselves resolutely apart from the mainstream.而眼下我们最应该做的是不断plumb the mysteries of EXTENSIVE READING 努力在将来sign up for a graduate fellowship甚至earning tenure .尽管大家只give it pretty long odds,但这才是真正get EBA going的最好办法,我们完全没必要sponsor resolution on ...特别是在我们的strategic plate is full的情况下,我们应尽量avoid bankrupting ourself in a futile arms race ,相反我们应该努力reaching an accomodation并最终赢得a mutually beneficial embrace!最后总结一句no hammering out , no spinning out ,TO BE PRAGMATIC IS GLORIOUS !!!!

上周去看了03表演的毕业大戏《钦差大臣》，今天晚上又去看了04表演的期末汇演，感觉很震撼------不愧是经过三试招进来的，很专业，他们几乎精细到每个细节：每句台词的语调、每个表情的把握、每个动作的变化。真是看了才知道原来老师们用来赞扬我们的戏剧的那些话原来不过是我们用来自欺欺人的资本。好像很多人对广院的表演系不以为然，但从每天早上6点的集体练功、每天晚上排练室的灯光便可看出他们很下工夫。一个朋友说，表演一辈子都学不完，可能在现在的影视圈中，广院表演系的牌子还不够硬，但我相信他们总有一天会成功的。

I earned some money this week , firstly on friday , I went to Peking university with my godbrother Tim and Drew , we worked as "interpreter" for the IPC(international palaeontological congress) since Tim's father was the member of China Association for Science and Technology. In fact , we know little about this subject apart from "Cambrian" , actually , our responsibility was only to take the participants from congress reception to their hotel ,and then , to a buffet .

Then , the next two days , I was worked in the international conference center as a game host . I was exhausted after 10 hours' work each day from 8.am to 6.pm ,altough the pay is low for a host , I got dozens of little gifts beyond expectation ! What's more , maybe sounds boring or even ridiculous , the working experience ,for I find myself much superior than just being a student's tutor who earns 35 or 50 per hour or a blue color worker in a fast-food restaurant . 

Unluckily , on my way back , I broke my "little smart", so now I used my mobile phone , and my new Beijing number is 13426411880 .

 

Recently i met 2 girls from Tsinghua , and then I know what does SUPERGIRL really means , of course not the superficial bisexual ones singing in Hunan TV.The first one , the champion of the contest which i have also taken part in , is a teacher of New Oriental's basic English department She also got the first prize in the 21st century speech competition and been to Australia with our EBA's godsister -------professor Su's most favored student. The second girl , my Japanese classmate , who always sits beside me quitely and even frigidly turned out to be the Number 1 in science NMET , with full marks in math and science colligation , she got 720 totally. What's more , she is only 19 and has skipped the grade for 3 times . Now she is a junior student and will soon go to tokyo university where her father worked as a math teacher.

Here i find that talented people are anywhere , and there is a long way for me to run . Frankly speaking , when I was young , i was also considered a whiz kid in my little world , but now , to be pragmatic seems more glorious , by the way , tomorrow will be the one-year anniversary of NMET , bryond celebration I also wish those friends who stayed in the hell for the new-burning good luck !

最近真是比赛不断,首先要祝贺好朋友黄橙子进入了成都超女50强,也希望大家能够支持她!其次就是I my self . I got the third prize in the fianl contest "第三届首都高校外语文化节形象大使选拔赛暨口语展示大赛" and thanks to my friends 李典、帕尔哈提、刘劲容、刘畅、程翔 I also win the prize of "best talent and skill". Although sth expected happened on the stage , the volume of the microphone and also our cooperation , it still turned out to be outstang as our band's virgin show . And i also feel deeply grateful to my friend 张力 who provide me with the electric piano , my godbrothers 邢旭东、王骁、姜廖晨 who acted as my porter and carried the piano from 梆子井 to 报告厅 , 邬妮妮------ my camerawoman , and also those friends and classmate who came to support me . 

The result wasn't so excited that I didn't earn the ￥1000 because of 0.4 marks inferior . But anyway , I also earn a lot , such as friendship and experience . This time when I stood on the stage , I hardly felt any nervousness at all and I thought that I took the whole control of the stage , this stage sense must be benifit for my left career of EBA .

 

It rains cats and dogs today , i stay at home------now i've considered my domitry as my home , it's small but snug . Maybe this friday will be the last I stayed home , since next week's friday i will be on the stage , i would have proud of my couragement and diligence after 20 years since everybody knows how hard it is to get on there , competeting for the so called "big shit image"(some of my friends give it such an amusing name scornfully as the chinese pronuciation 使 & 屎 are totally the same). In fact , i will not be there if someone didn't force me to hand in the sign up paper . Well , since i was enrolled into the final contest , I find myself uneasy even just in my daily life that i can hardly consentrate myself when doing some reciting work , what's more is that i do not know how to prepare it except waiting them to inform me the place and time .

Luckily there's nothing serious about my dear laptop , after reconstructing my 1GB DDR2 , she returns home refreshed and revatilized . This time , getting there had been the fun . And my 2 hours double way journey was no longer that tedious . Just as Janet Mandell Goldstein mentioned , i also find our chinese are constantly in a hurry------and not just to get point A to point B , our whole society has become a nation in search of the quick fix------in more ways than one , and we , on the other hand are also on our way to being that new species of mechenized savage , the push-button Neanderthal . Our colleges inevitably graduate a number of such life forms but it cannot be said that they went to college ; rather the college went through them------without making contact .

                                              Part 1

前天又去了次北外,不过这次不是跟英播,而是跟DE去的,北京高校街舞大赛,发现好多学校都跳的很好,虽然最后齐舞还是我们拿了第一.(另外还拿了两个单项第一,一共六个第一我们社占了一半,果然牛B)其实刚看到别人表演的时候,心里还很虚,不过大家好象都很自信,好象早有把握,不过那20号人往台上一站的确气势上就把人家给压死了.

                                              Part 2

廖晨学西语越来越起劲了,最近居然还用西语写Space,不过他的确心态很好,每次学完都跑到3楼去跟那些西语班的人交流,然后把人家气得半死.于是自己也更有动力了.而我的2外虽有起色但效果还是差强人意,冤枉花了那么多钱和时间.哎.Lilac说我做什么都太心急了,要漫漫来.

                                              Part 3

回了躺武汉再到北京,又不适应了.什么东西都乱了.要干的事情太多太杂,其实归根到底是自己太浮躁,静不下心来.晚上还是老睡不着觉,早上又老起不来,起来了也是两眼发黑,没精神的.其实心态真的很重要,为什么老把自己弄的这么累呢?想想那些还在复读为高考而奋战的同学们吧,这样会让自己轻松许多.

                                              Part 4

周五和Maggie Ding谈了话,仔细想想觉得其实英语播音这个专业以及现在的形势真的都很好,而且很适合我,所以一定要坚持好好学下去.前途一片光明......马上在广院的第一年也快结束了,虽然这一年没学到什么实质性的知识,但却积累了甚至本该四年积累到的经验,好象什么都体会过了,又有了高考完后的那种感觉------再给我一次重上高中的机会我会怎么做------所以趁现在还早就当个自己一次重上大学的机会好好规划一下吧.不能再偷懒了,写完这篇就背单词去.......

                                              Part 5

关于Space,以后可能会更多的用英文,甚至是日文,毕竟是在学语言,多练是关键,其实看多了Space,觉得每天一上来就写自己今天又怎么郁闷不爽的确是很没趣的,不只我是否也染上此劣习.还是老老实实当个好学生吧,把Space当作文本用,写爆了再换新的!

 

英文版＜三字经＞,未满16岁勿see 中华民族悠久的经典启蒙教材，其教育意义果然不像看上去那么肤浅   人之初：At the begining of life. 性本善：Sex is good. 性相近：Basically,all the sex are same. 习相远：But it depends on how the way you do it. 苟不教：If you do not practise all the time. 性乃迁：Sex will leave you.. 教之道：The way of learning it 贵以专：is very important to make love with only one person. 昔孟母：Once a great mother, Mrs Meng 择邻处：chose her neighbour to avoid bad sex influence. 子不学：If you don''t study hard, 断机杼：Your Dick will become useless. 窦燕山 ：Dou, the Famous 有义方 ：owned a very effective exciting medicine 教五子 ：All his five son took it 名俱扬 ：and their sexual ability were well-kown. 养不教 ：If your children don''t know how to do it, 父之过 ：It is all your fault. 教不严 ：If they had lots of problems with it, 师之惰 ：their teacher must be too lazy to tell them details on sex. 子不学 ：You may refuse to study this 非所宜 ：but that is a real mistake 幼不学 ：If you don''t learn it in childhood, 老何为 ：you will lose your ability when aged 玉不琢 ：If you don''t exercise your dick, 不成器 ：It won''t become hard and strong. 人不学： If you don''t learn sex, 不知义 ：You can by no means enjoy its sweetness   This was the most amazing translation i had ever seen ,really unbelievable    , hope u enjoy it , also thanks to Edward.L , he provided me the whole passage !

I was totally driven mad by this high-tech world since i'm a computer idiot myself , i can't load on this MSN space for half a month partly because my dear laptop could not connect the internet after i carried it home for my 7days vacation . And one of my professional brother also suggest me reinstall my laptop , anyway, this is definitely impossible unless i buy a 20G Ipod to let all my assets shiftable . However , finally when my vacation was nearly about to be ruined , i achieved after trial and error , thaks to my antique computer (i always consider it as some kind of abandoned trash) i got accessed !

Looking backwards , these days from Apr. 1th fool's day to May the international labor's day , these days must have been the busiest i would havbe experienced this semester . The spring of BI(broadcasting institute), the blood affair , my virgin visit to sacred CCTV accompaning Mandy......  some have already faded away . So i felt so eager to write sth but i was so confused where to begin with . And i still have some homework to do , so, i should catch time .

今天语音课老师请来了3位重量级人物——传说中的大师哥郑晨光(CRI新闻主播)，还有我们武汉的师姐欧阳琪（上届21世纪杯英语演讲大赛一等奖得主），来自国际新闻的师哥王冠（21世纪杯本届一等奖得主）

觉得大师哥有句话让我感触很深，其实也是很多人常说的要注重英语基础，而真正的播音只是最后一个环节，就像两位一等奖得主所说的，现在的大赛的trend是more focus on ur content , while perfect pronuciation is the basis.其实我一直觉得英播最让我不爽的一点就是播音方面的东西太少了，让我完全感觉不出我们专业和北外、北大英语系的区别和我们所谓的优势——播音。不过现在总算明白即使真的把声音练的很好了，语音很标准了，英语基础不行还是扯淡。＊＊ 大师哥的声音的确很好听，欧阳琪师姐比网上那张照片好看很多，又高又瘦身材巨好口语也帮，简直完美了，英播武汉人的骄傲啊。

另外很高兴我们专业已经有这么多优秀的人和优秀的成绩（包括班上那位似乎不可超越的强人）这让我知道了自己和他们的差距，也坚定了向他们努力的决心，都是同一个老师教出来的他们能做到的我理论上因该也有可能。还有2年时间我也大3了，不知从现在开始努力是否能达到他们那样的水平，但愿如此吧。

大3时我们班也会有人参加21世纪杯，那个人会是谁？（从现在的情况看是做梦也轮不到我的）突然想到了宿舍的几位室友，大家都很了不起。东头的两位与世无争，很欣赏他们那种心态，只可惜我做不到；西边的我和哓则是典型的入世思想——我们都会尽全力去争取机会，当然受的伤也会更多，突然可以体会到骁的坚强，将创伤独自埋在心里等待灰尘去抚平。这也是男人不同与女人的不同，欢乐可以分享而痛苦则得独自承受。其实我俩性格中有很多相象的地方，唯一的区别就是他是刀，我是鞭……

每次写日志必须做的两件事就是跑题然后再回到原题（其实关于写博客的目的就足以用一篇文章来讨论了，不过我只当他是回收站，用来储存一些我硬盘里已放不下的思想和感情，必要时再将其还原再次利用），那就是今天的另一个收获：Professor Wu的秘密训练法。那种让人想死的训练，在大庭广众之下做演讲。其实这就是一种极端非人道主义的变态训练法（肯定有人这么想），但既然它成功了，就证明它合理。其实很多时候我也在尝试做一些别人会觉得很丢脸、不正常的事情，不过我现在的程度还停留在练胆阶段，其实敢于在人前说话是学主持的一项重要能力。而要想得到100%的收效就必须有120%的训练，当在哪里都不会觉得害怕时，在台上便完全不会怯场了。真希望自己某一天也能得到这样的训练，或者有一天capable enough自己训练自己，就像疯狂英语的李阳那样，对着人群鄙视的目光大喊：I like losing face!

今天又胡乱写了这么多，不知再这样下去，空间会不会被写爆，中途还意外地在MSN上遇到了大师哥，所以特嘱大师哥为题以记之。

五一要回家罗,好高兴,哈哈,哪些东西不用带呢?除了书........

今天上日语课时突然发现日语很简单,很多不同的中文表达法在日语中都只有一种.其实仔细想想,其实英语也不难,特别是跟汉语比起来,英语会26个字母48个音标就基本能读了,日语也只用71个假名就几乎什么都可以读出来了,而汉语,光是拼音都要学那么这么久了,更别说那么多形态各异的汉字.反过来想想,既然我连汉语这么难这么牛b的语言都可以掌握,学好英语和日语又能难到哪去呢.嘿嘿,若有所思,恍然大悟,茅塞顿开,醍醐贯顶ing......

准确的说已经有7年没春游过了,从小学4年级开始,充斥着我童年记忆的是那在中南对面的那个科技大厦办的陪优班的晚班(经过重重挑选的一个专门针对外校招生考试的班),然后是从第一次考试的35分到第二次的10分(其实第应该是0分,老师只出了10道题,我偷看了旁边同学一道题的答案,然后胡乱写了些步骤混来的分)到后来的120,130.从刚开始坐在教室的第14排到某一天坐到了第1排又回到第4排(按考试成绩排座位).除了每天做不完的试卷外妈妈奖励我的肯德基可以说是我最大的精神和物质支柱,那段在魔鬼训练营的时光虽然最后给了我快乐,却也让那仅有的几次春游显得更加弥足珍贵.记得每次和同学们一边坐着车一边唱着歌去春游时那激动的心情.还有大家坐在草地上的那全部由零食组成的丰盛的午餐......

然而好久都没有这样的感觉了,虽然也经常出游,但几乎没有过这种小学时代春游班的感觉:大家一起玩转盘,坐过山车,踢毽子,打羽毛球,累了便围个圈,一边津津有味的吃零食一边作游戏.那种感觉真的很好,只可惜理智战胜了情感,因为下午有课我很早就走了.但这种失去多年却又重新寻回的天真无暇的童真,我会好好珍惜......

周五晚上的自习室总比平时清静很多,我一个人坐在动院的202的角落里,一边听着Radio里CRI女主播用那干瘪的中文介绍新歌,一边默写并大声朗读着あいうえお。世界有时孤单得并不需要同类，一个人的自习室反而更加自由，仿佛迷失在异次元空间中，周围格外的静，思绪在网格状的空间里铺展开来，其实人的心灵世界是一种很神秘的东西，而通往这个世界的门一定要在特殊的时空才能打开．

突然发现原来所有对自己的了解竟都是从别人的眼光里得来的，这是一种莫名的悲哀．

又觉得将来似乎那么的遥不可期，可当它突然到来摆在面前时却又让我毫无防备．

.......

我享受着自己那些自然迸发出的没有逻辑的思绪，

直到钥匙的声响打断了我，走出教室，对面的218里竟诡异地坐了许多人......

今晚去旁听了电影语言课,老师讲的内容是镜头：光学镜头、电影镜头，近焦、远焦、广角，大远景、远景、大全景、全景、小全景、中景、中近景、近景、特写、大特写，满景镜头、空镜头，固定镜头、运动镜头，推镜头、拉镜头、摇镜头、移镜头（横移、斜移、纵深移、环移、跟移）、升降镜头。看到这些熟悉的文字，恍惚间又唤起了当年考导演前的感觉——老师在放片子时看到的都不是完整的画面而是各种精心设计的镜头，旁边的yoland突然笑着问我想不想转专业，最近一阵转专业的确闹得很火，也有一些朋友因觉得自己不适合自己的专业而十分彷徨，我突然想起了马哲老师的一句话：上大学前选择你所喜欢的专业，上大学后喜欢你所选择的专业。这是一种值得推崇的积极态度，既然选择了就要毫不犹豫地积极地走下去。因此，我对自己的选择没有后悔。